Issue #19: 14 Mecheir 2756
19 September 2007
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THE SUPER FANTASTIC “HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANKHET” ISSUE!It’s chocked so full of goodness you’ll want to slap your mummy! Twice.Contest(raversy)By: The EyeIn desperate need of a public relations boost, Zatoichi (macrocosm) decided to host a new contest. His contest, apparently inspired by LDS, would begin with competing teams and culminate in individual challenges to determine a winner. With the rules posted and established, teams of three quickly materialized, and the first challenge was issued. Teams were instructed to make Zatoichi laugh. The team that made him laugh the hardest would get the most points. They were asked to be original in their comedy and they were told that late entries would get zero points. Seems simple, doesn’t it? Little did anyone know, there would not be a second round. Things began to break down when Zatoichi accepted and awarded points to a team despite their tardy submission. This would be followed by accusations of favoritism as the late team was headed by former Iron Maiden luminary DarkEternal (N: Level Nine). Things would go from bad to worse as originality requirement and the language around it came under attack. Zatoichi lent credibility to his detractors by bickering with his contestants and then blaming everyone but himself for the situation. At this point contestants began to drop out and the entire thing completely fell apart. The moral of this story is that if you make rules, stick to them. Also, not phrasing rules as request is probably a good idea too. Since the failure of the contest, Zatoichi has renamed to Duke, perhaps in an attempt to distance himself from the affair and start anew. Meanwhile, in what is very hopefully unrelated news, Snigu Ka Tet (Shadows) ran the gamut of forums, from the Halls of the Initiates all the way to the Avatars, decreeing himself in each to be both “Nekkid” and “On Fire”. Pakhet Goes DownBy: The EyeWhat’s a really fast way to go from level 80 Selket to level 1 and pathless? Get expelled from the Riven. That’s precisely what happened to Pakhet on Mechier 11 when she killed Kauket several hours before the “acceptable time”. Within minutes of the slaying, Euplicitous Aerophram (N: Riven) and Mikolaj (Riven) sundered and judged their former dominion mate. Moments later Aerophram would announce that Pakhet, who offered neither public explanation nor apology for her actions, was no longer “worthy of being Riven”. The situation escalated when, in the wake of a second Kauket related judgment, relative new-comer Dijital (eidolon) challenged the severity of the punishment and chastised those who turn on their own members. What followed was a heated discussion with topics ranging from the establishment of a nomarch ruling council to the potential ambiguity of the reasoning behind Pakhet’s harsh treatment. Critics of Aerophram and the Riven openly disavowed judgment as a penalty for slaying Kauket and paralleled Pakhet and Yipikaye’s handling. Meanwhile members and sympathizers of the Riven dismissed the similarities and insinuated that there were other internal factors at play. Just where Pakhet, who is also a former Shadow, will wind up now remains a mystery. Provoked by his call to arms and refusal to substantiate certain claims, Mikolaj devastated Dijital to death. Ozymandias (eidolon) promptly retaliated by restoring his fallen comrade and dooming Mikolaj to death. The rampaging Rivener promptly retorted, sundering both Ozymandias and Jumsy when the latter restored the former. In an impressive display Ozymandias used a Metasis Charm, converted to Ahmose, paradoxed Mikolaj, and then used a second charm to return to the path of Hathor. A call for a ceasefire would be ignored by Mikolaj, who would devastate both Jumsy and Ozymandias upon his return. Only then, having had the proverbial last word, would the Riven accept an end to the hostilities. Now a member down and the subject of considerable criticisms, the Riven’s position seems perhaps a little less secure, but with no significant resistance manifesting their dominance remains stable. Like its numerous predecessors, Dijital’s proposed “Ruling Council” failed to garner any significant support. His effort was not entirely in vain. Numerous disciples voiced disapproval with the use of judgment for Kauket related punishments. Whether or not their voices will be heard, however, remains to be seen. Meanwhile, in potentially unrelated news, Wonky is Good disbanded Imperial Conquest. Wonky explained the move, which came as a surprise to many, claming that the embattled dominion had seen better days and was ready to be put to rest. He also vehemently denied that Aerophram, who allegedly demanded the disbanding some time ago, had any involvement in the decision. Well, Well, Well…By: The WhispererOn Ankhet’s one year anniversary Mod 4.1 was unleashed, opening the much anticipated Black Well. The new area, accessible by shelling out 20 Ka Fragments to the Black Oracle, costs no anima to adventure in and features a new kind of interface. Akin to more typical MUDS, the Black Well is a map area where players move in any of the cardinal directions. Hidden in the depths are beasties like the Hungry Mist, the Black Minotaur, and the Blasphemous Idol. Each of these creatures can only be killed once per day and the latter two become universally unavailable when slain. Numerous new artifacts have been associated with the area including an “Ebony Headcutter” and a “Pharaoh’s Scepter”. There are also several types of decanters, which when used function much like a Puzzle Box, and a “Ghost Lamp” which functions like a reusable Empty Bottle. There is also an enigma game that provides a several hour buff to potency and favour gains. Of course, if you lose you get Eradicated. I guess they don’t call it “the most dangerous game” for nothing! In addition to the Black Well, the new Mod included the attunement options for Atum-Ra and Apophis. While the precise details of these remain something of a hushed topic, those in the know seem excited about it. On a potentially ominous note, the Black Oracle now includes a new “Coming Soon” option that’ll cost 100 fragments to purchase. No Good DeedBy: The EyeOn Mechier 8, Mikolaj (Riven) exhausted and devastated Kazou (Macrocosm) to death. The roguish Riven went on to describe the brutal assault as retaliation for an unsolicited resurrection and subsequent request for a replacement Phoenix Fire. Mild debate emerged as membership in the Riven was offered as sufficient justification for any action taken by a member. In a pique of satirical commentary, Baltar (Shadows) offered Kazou the following advice, “If someone -- especially someone from The Riven -- attacks you for misconduct, post a properly-spelled, grammatically-correct public apology admitting that you were wrong, thanking your attacker(s) for calling it to your attention, and stating that you will not repeat your behavior.” Kazou, still haunted by his pandering past, found little sympathy for his plight and did actually thank both his assailant and detractors for teaching him lessons about charity and begging. While Macrocosm nomarch Yipikiaye declined to comment on the affair, the hostilities mark the latest chapter in a series of attacks on members of her dominion. While the various justifications are subject to debate, this reporter wonders if Macrocosm is falling into the gap left by Wonky is Good and Freya (Riven). Wiki-Tiki-Tavi!By: The EyeThanks to an entirely user-driven movement, Ankhet now has a definitive presence on Wikipedia. Inspired by relative newcomer Allispaul, players, such as Jumsy and Bottom-Heavy Grapefruit, took up the task of authoring, submitting, maintaining, and even defending the entry. The article, viewable via the link below, covers the very basic aspects of the game. A lot of care was invested to avoid spoilering too much and TAG even gets a nod. Apparently, we are a “credible source”. HA! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ankhet Remember, kids, Wikipedia is not a credible source for submitting or reporting enigmas. Every time you cite it the Oracle of Dakhla kills a kitten. Please. Think of the kittens. Oracular InterventionBy: the Mouth, the Eye, an ear and a noseThe Oracles have once again served up a heaping portion of spolierly goodness! This time around we’ve got a few tips and teasers regarding 4.1 and its impending sequel 4.5. Mod 4.1 brought with it functional attunements not only Atum-Ra but Apophis too. This marks the first time the bad guys get a little love from Hauhet. We’ve been informed that aside from the basic effect, each of these attunements is sensitive to a disciple’s Exalted/Forsaken status. What exactly that means, the Oracles declined to say, as usual. As for 4.5, they filled us in on a little of what to expect. Here’s a list straight from the horse’s (or Thebes) mouth: 1) a new seasonal merchant inspired by the Grinder contest 2) a new area with better favour than the forsaken plane/empyreal arena with no first strikers or trivia 3) the season of the witch 4) a few other things you’ll just have to find (good luck with that) Just for the record, we don’t actually believe that the Oracle of Thebes is a horse. We’re just saying that teaser number 4 certainly brought similar animal to mind. Ask Miss MummyDear Miss Mummy,Is it just me or is the Gazette getting more biased with each new issue? Why didn't you just summarize the first article to "The Riven is awesome and Iron Maiden sucks"? That last paragraph almost made me want to vomit. Sincerely, Anonymous Antagonist Well, DarkEternal, we disagree with your summary but, we call it like we see it. If you don’t like our articles, please write your own. You obviously know our email address. Do something constructive with it. Tip of the WeekSome monsters, such as the Deranged Hermit or Kaukhet, become unavailable to everyone else when killed. Keep that in mind when tackling these guys, as some of them are necessary to access certain areas or advantages. The best plan to avoid backlash from the other players is to try to kill these monsters as close to rollover as possible.Top of the GameHere are the current Ankhets: (Bold indicates a change from the previous issue)Ahmose: Baltar (81, Shadows) Amin-Ra: Euplicitous Aerophram (85, N: The Riven) Ammut: Bad Wolf (25) Anubis: Stormcaller (41, Shadows) Apophis: None. Atum-Ra: Mikolaj (80, The Riven) Bast: Jumsy (26) Hathor: Ozymandias (85, eidolon) Menthu: Skwisgaard Skwigelf (47) Selket: Maa-kheru (80) Sekhmet: Caine (85, eidolon) Thoth: Umbraj (60, Shadows) Dominion: Shadows (58) Beast Slayers: 50 – Dark Eternal (N: Level Nine) Truth Sayers: 159 - Baltar (Shadows) Aside from a few conversions, the leader board has been relatively stable with only the dark divinity path wanting for an Ankhet. With the implementation of 4.1 we expected to see some influx to Atum-Ra, Apophis, and Bast, but that has yet to really materialize. With the leaders of Ammut and Bast both below level 30, Ankhet status remains as realistic goal for those looking to complete the Atum quest. Quote(s) of the Week“Happy One Year Anniversary to us!” – The Oracle of Thebes Halls of Initiation: System Alerts – Please Read: Post #90 “21:26 - pakhet slew Kauket” – The Heralds Heralds Log: 11 Mechier 2756 “The world of Ankhet is more than just about the exploration itself, it is about the community and the peace that disciples show one another. It's just too bad that some of you feel that when someone doesn't walk the way you feel they should that they and anyone who helps them deserves to be punished.” – Dijital (regarding the judgment of Pakhet) Halls of Initiation: Disciple Attacks: Post #1 “This contest shows that people are just not ready to have dealings with me. I broke my own rule for a reason that is my own, thats all that matters to me when it's my contest.” – Duke (then Zatoichi) The Underworld: Contest winners and next challenge: Post #142 “Hey Everybody. I just thought I would run around the fora Nekkid and On Fire. Anyone want to join me? Maybe we can get a special mention in TAG if enough of us do it.” – Snigu Ka Tet Halls of Initiation: Running Around Nekkid and On Fire: Post #1 “You made your point, you are big and tough. I break this chain of violence. Poof, done. I will not strike back, you win.” – Ozymandias (regarding Mikolaj) Announcement #460 “He's Riven. Of course he was justified.” – Em (on Mikolaj’s attacks on Kazuo) The Underworld: Kazuo: Post #4 “With this in mind, we have decided to disband Imperial Conquest. Suffice to say, this has nothing to do EA's frightfully egotistical wishes, but a lot to do with something else.” – Wonky is Good Halls of Initiation: Imperial Conquest: Post #1 “Only the end results are tallied, my little poppet.” – Euplicitous Aerophram Halls of Initiation: Imperial Conquest: Post #2 “What, no welcome party?' she sneered before adjusting the headdress and jewelry previously owned by the fool who had stepped unwittingly into her tomb.” – Anupet (formally Archinta) Announcement #461 “If you think that is brain-bending, think on the fact that they have managed to send "information" at ftl speeds, but if I remember correctly, our means of info is basically light, so we have managed to make light go faster than itself.” – Kalshinra (we have no idea) The Underworld: Eradication: Post: 66 From the Editor’s DeskEnjoying TAG? Want to see it continue?Contribute! Please send any questions, comments, or submissions to AnkhetGazette@gmail.com. Submissions for next week's issue should be in by Friday evening. Previous Issues can be viewed by using the Archives button below. View Archives |
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Ankhet the game is available at ankhet.net.
In Memoriam: Ninjalicious